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| Interlude: Caesar's Valentine's Day Special II |
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| |  |  Cette histoire a ete redigee pour etre lue sous forme d?album. |
Interlude: Caesar's Valentine's Day Spec...
cree par:
Netsfn1427
Country: Etats-Unis d'Amerique
Langage: Anglais
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cree: 14.02.2009
derniere mise a jour: 14.02.2009
Nombre d'entrees: 93
Description:Part II of my Ten Caesars Valentine's Day Special. Will Cecil learn his lesson?
Family Name: Goodie
Nom du terrain: More Writing
Categories: Comédie, Débats et observations, Satirique
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Welcome back to the Ten Caesars Valentine's Day special! When we last left our heroes and heroines, Cecil and Pina had just visited Heather Huffington in the Underworld. Meanwhile in the land of the living, Elissandra was about to discover something shocking.
Elissa: "Cecil? I thought I heard something down here... like you are talking to someone, then a loud thud. Is everything alright?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "AH!!!! Cecil!!!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "Oh hi Elissa. Didn't hear you come in."
Elissa: "Drusila Caesar, what have you done?!"
Dru: "Just the result of a little concoction I threw together quickly. Did you know that what chemicals my body produces when I'm pregnant differ from when I'm not? I know I was surprised when I found out."
Elissa: "YOU KILLED MY HUSBAND???!!!!!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "Don't be so melodramatic 'Lis. I didn't kill my brother. I just put him under. Or more specifically, to the underworld."
Elissa: "Wait... you sent him to the underworld... but didn't kill him?"
Dru: "Sure. I arranged with Grimmy to have him speak to his dead ancestors. I figured that would set the guy straight."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "I swear, of all the dumb, crazy things you have ever done Dru, this might be the worst. Poisoning your brother so he can talk to your loony dead ancestors. Lovely."
Dru: "Hey 'Lis, I did it for you. No woman deserves to go without some good lovin from her husband. Besides, you've gone what... almost a year without having a baby? I know how that affects us family oriented folk."
Elissa: "I won't get anymore babies if he's DEAD!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "I told you, he's NOT dead. Just in the underworld until he learns a valuable lesson."
Elissa: "Which is?"
Dru: "Got me. I just figured it would get him to start woo-hoo-ing you more when he does get back to ourside."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "Speaking of which, I think I could use some woo-hoo myself. I'm headed home."
Elissa: "What?! What now?"
Dru: "Well I'm going to order Sextus into the bedroom and then---"
Elissa: "Not you! Me! Cecil!"
Dru: "Oh. Well when he's learned his lesson, he'll wake up. Oh yeah, give my regards to my nephews."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "When he learns his 'lesson' he'll wake up? But... Cecil is so darn stubborn... what if he refuses to learn anything? Does that means he might never wake up?"
That is a question that would only be answered in time. Meanwhile, back in the Underworld...
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Hmph. What stop is this on the Latin tour? I certainly hope no delusional cheese heads live here."
Pina: "Well no cheese heads."
Cecil: "That does not fill me with much confidence."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "Don't worry. This one apparently wants to see you. She specially requested it. Of course we were coming here anyway, so make sure to tell her that. I hate when she knows she got what she wants."
Cecil: "She? And why do I sense an unmistakable evil eminating from this lot?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Well, well, well. Look at what Death has dragged in."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Cecil Goodytwoshoes. The long lost son of Rome returns. A man who upholds our ideals despite being born in a far off land, filled with horrible corrupting influences like pink, kittens and worst of all, syrupy love."
Cecil: "Surely you do not insult our feline friends."
Julia: "And here it was, I thought you just liked fishes. Well it is good to finally meet you."
Pina: *Ahem* "And let me say, it is an honor to be in your presence Julia."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "You can consider those feelings less than mutual."
Pina: "What?"
Julia: "You are a disgrace and a disappointment. I have little need for whiners who complain about not getting loved enough. I have even less need for those who decide to post their tantrums on Death's Secret, crying like a 12 year old about how we big bad girls are ignoring her. For the life of me, I cannot imagine why we would Cecil, can you?"
Pina: "If you think you can get away with this insult..."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "I can, have and will. Now leave us. I have matters to attend to with a true Roman. Perhaps you can keep the servant some company. I'm sure she'll love to have a fellow child to cry with."
Pina: "Racken freakin *#&$@!! Darn schutta..."
Julia: "Now then Cecil, you probably would like to sit. Allow me to remedy that. SERVANT GIRL! HERE, NOW!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribonia: "Yes mother?"
Julia: "Mother? You lost the right to use that term years ago. You shall address me by my proper term, as I do you, slave."
Scribonia: *sigh* "Yes, master."
Julia: "Fetch Master Goodytwoshoes a seat at once."
Cecil: "This is strange. I have never seen anyone address their child as slave Mistress Julia."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Let your child betray you and then have a chance at revenge Cecil. You'll find it much harder to pass up than you expect. And Cecila did not actively take part in a scheme against you."
Cecil: "Why would she submit now then?"
Julia: "Because thanks to the power I weild down here, I managed to lock her love Shawn Severus away. She will not see him again until I allow it."
Cecil: "You do not intend her to ever see him again, do you?"
Julia: "Now, now, eternity *is* a long time. So perhaps one day, when I am feeling a touch more generous."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribs: "Here is the chair master."
Julia: "Good. Now keep an eye on that pathetic wench Agrippina. I would not be surprised if she attempts to vandalize mine furniture. If I see one thing out of place, consider it another two weeks before you see your beloved traitor again."
Scribs: "Yes... master..."
Cecil: "............."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Now, let's get down to business. Cecil, I am a large fan of your work. Despire coming from a world with excessive amounts of pink and cuteness, you managed to create an aura of uncertainty and tension the likes of which they had never seen. You did not settle for being told you would be second in line; oh no, you moved forward to seize the day and your enemies, by the throat. And much like myself, you achieved great success."
Cecil: "I am humbled by your praise. However, all I did was maintain a course that was the natural conclusion of Squeaky Clean values."
Julia: "Like I just followed Roman politics to their natural end. Products of our world my boy. I am also very impressed by your ability to keep trivial items like family seperate from the larger goal. The way you manipulated Cecila and did not beg to save Maximilian's life... it nearly brought a tear to my eye."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "I assure you it was only my intent to create and uphold a value system that would serve as the betterment of the world as a whole."
Julia: "That is fine. I don't mind the reasons you give, just that you stick to your principles in face of temptations."
Cecil: "Shall we stop beating around the bush Mistress? What is it you wish to discuss with me?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Cecil, Roman politics under the Julio-Claudian had an interest twist; heredity never seemed to pass down from father to son. Rather it was always through the grandnephew. Octavian was the grandnephew of Julius Caesar. Caligula was the grandnephew of Tiberius. Claudius was the grandnephew of Octavian. Nero was the grandnephew of Claudius."
Cecil: "I don't follow."
Julia: "Tiberius is my brother. His son was Gaius, my nephew. Since Gaius is your father, that makes you my grandnephew. And considering my original choice for heir is currently disappointing me, I would like to offer you that position when you return to the living."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Why would I choose to do such a thing? I am beholdent to no one."
Julia: "And you should not be. But the rewards for aiding me are immense. Few hold as much sway in the afterlife. When your time comes, I will make sure you spend eternity living like a king."
Cecil: "An intriguing offer. I could go about spreading my values across a city that is in desperate need of moral reform. The depravity of it all. For example, can you believe that my wife is insisting I woo-hoo her on a routine basis? Such a thought is horrifying! Woo-hoo is a dirty thing and should be banned except in cases where science cannot aid in procreation."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "What?! Are you out of your mind?! That's the best part of living! What are you gay or something?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Gay? No, I am merely Asexual. The only times I have engaged in the act is when my wife drugged me with a love potion. Thankfully, I believe I am developing a resistance to it now."
Julia: "This... this is absolutely crazy!"
Cecil: "I beg your pardon?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "What kind of freak wants to outlaw sex? It's pleasurable, occasionally neccessary for procreation and an extremely useful tool to manipulate others with."
Cecil: "It is also extremely dirty."
Julia: "....... Just get out."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribs: "Agrippina, I have not been allowed to keep up with the events of the living these days. The *explative deleted* will not allow me to learn anything that might be happening as punishment."
Pina: "Oh really? Well then I guess I should tell you the world almost ended a few weeks back."
Scribs: "What happened?! Did barbarian hordes nearly sack Roma?"
Pina: "No, the Arizona Cardinals came within a minute of winning the Super Bowl. When Larry Fitzgerald broke into the open field, I thought for sure we were all about to get a whole lot of company down here."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribs: "Well that is... um... lovely? In any case, there is someone I would like to know about."
Pina: "Marcellus? He's still crazy with his fellow loon Ana. They'll probably be down here soon."
Scribs: "No... I always knew Marcellus would be fine. I meant my son, Sextus. Please tell me he is alright."
Pina: "Sexty? Well he could be better. He married the craziest woman in Rome."
Scribs: "Oh no... not that horrible Drusila! She's a mini Gaius."
Pina: "I know!!!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "Everyone likes her anyway and it's disgusting. Anyone can be crazy, but it takes a special kind of someone to be calculating in their actions. I don't understand it Scribs. I tried to be better than her in that. I'm pretty, I'm smart and I don't decide things on a whim. Isn't there a place for a cool, calculating villainess anymore."
Scribs: "I... um... Sextus?"
Pina: "Oh yeah. So she's married to him and now has him as glorified genetic donor who's only purpose in life is to nod politely when she rants and keep her baby factory running. You'd have been a lot happier had I killed her. I would have treated Sexty much better and we'd have had a beautiful family of our own; way better than all of Dru's malcontents."
Scribs: "You... you wanted to replace my grandchildren?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribs: "Get out of here now."
Pina: "But I..."
Scribs: "If you don't leave this instant, you will be spending the next thousand years putting yourself back together."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "That ended well."
Pina: "Shut up goody boy."
Cecil: "Perhaps you should refrain from your instinct to show your emotions on your sleeve."
Pina: "From where I was standing we both got tossed."
Cecil: "You were asked to leave twice."
Pina: "Yeah, yeah, shut up."
Cecil: "So where are we now?"
Pina: "The next stop on the line."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Tiberius: "Bry, are you ever going to get off that computer game?"
Brystin: "I dunno Ti. Is your mother going to make me?"
Tiberius: "That happened once. Can't you let it go?"
Brystin: "Gee, Renee forced me to marry into a legacy where I ended up dead and had my son turn out to be a mass murderer. You should be pleased if being kicked off the computer is my greatest concern."
Tiberius: *sigh*
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Tiberius: "Well, well, what have we here? Gaius' son, paying us a visit? Sit down Cecil, sit down. Engage this old man in chess."
Cecil: "You don't look all that old."
Tiberius: "No, in the Underworld we are allowed to regain our youth. I suppose it's more astethic than anything else, as our youth provides no extra benefits."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Brystin: "Then maybe you can explain how Meadow is waddling around boasting about having your baby."
Tiberius: "How should I know. We're all dead. In theory she should not be able to have children. And besides, I have not touched her since I came down here. Plus she was a teenager when she died. I did not realize it also worked at aging children forward!"
Brystin: "Sure, sure. And she was like that when you arrived?"
Tiberius: "Yes!"
Cecil: "And they wonder why I find sexual relations appalling."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Tiberius: "It can lead to messy situations Cecil, I give you that. But it has plenty of other benefits as well. Nothing is greater than the power of the touch of a soft skinned blonde."
Brystin: "HA! That proves it."
Tiberius: "That proves nothing! Fewer things beat a life without my mother around, but that's just as much a pipe dream these days!"
Cecil: "You seem to have let the difficulties of your life affect you grandfather. That why it is essential to control your emotions at all time. Show no weakness and others will not be able to find yours. Opening yourself up to others completely is a way to suffer pain."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "And I believe that is checkmate."
Tiberius: "Well played. But remember Cecil, while we can hold certain principles to be absolute, a good general knows no rule that cannot be broken. If we hold steadfast with everything we do, we become predictable. Such a fate befell myself, it befell my mother and even my sister. If you obsess with not showing emotion and weakness, then others will use that as a point from which to strike from."
Cecil: "I... see."
Tiberius: "You don't, but I believe one day, you will. Now go on, they are waiting for you."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Brystin: "Egads, I know those cheekbones and that nose. You are my descendent aren't you?"
Pina: "You don't even know who I am?"
Brystin: "Well I know Claudius is ruling Rome and he has a crazy sister named Drusila. Also that Gaius is dead. But I don't think I've seen you before. Then again, I only know that stuff because Tiberius blabbed it when he was going on and on about how he's happy that he's out of that mess."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "This is a disgrace. But regardless, I am your granddaughter, Agrippina. I am also the only person with any idea of what is going on these days in Rome."
Brystin: "Then why are you here?"
Pina: "Okay, I *was* the only person who had any idea what was going on. Then I got tricked into taking part of a poisoning contest against my sister Drusila. I lost. But she cheated and poisoned both plates."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Brystin: "OOOH! Princess Bride style!"
Pina: "Shut up grandmother. The point is I was robbed. If it had been a fair contest, I would have triumphed."
Brystin: "Well I can understand that. It's never fun to be tricked into death. It happened to me too you know; I was told that I could reach permaplatnum status by running with scissors. Turned out to be an internet rumor."
Pina: "Geez, you must feel like an idiot."
Brystin: "Yeah, sometimes. But then I realize Gaius would have killed me anyway. At least I sort of went out on my own terms."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Brystin: "Besides, the illdacious B spent six months on the near the top of the charts. That's a pretty good ride. Almost makes up for the whole forced to marry into a family that eventually killed me thing."
Pina: "Your rap album lasted six months at #2? Platinum?"
Brystin: "Double. Let's see miss music Marina top that!"
Pina: "I think I'm going to be sick."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Renee: "Julia's got to be stopped. Even *I* think she's gone too far."
Augustus: "Perhaps you are right. Scribonia and Shawn deserve better."
Renee: "Who? I was talking about her blog post. Today she started gloating about how she managed to destroy me, thus making her the greatest schemer Rome has ever seen! I say PFFT to that! Most of her schemes failed. All of mine worked, including positioning Gaius to get on the throne! *I* should be number one."
Augustus: *sigh* "Renee, we have company."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Renee: "Hmmm... No, not impressive at all. Send it back."
Octavian: "Renee, this is our great grandson, Cecil."
Renee: "Hmph, what makes him great? He hasn't killed anyone yet. I expect more from my lineage. Gaius and Drusila, now there were some high quality offspring."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Great grandmother Renee, murder is not the only way to make one's precense felt. As I would have explained to Julia, had she not rudely dismissed me, there are plenty of effective ways to bend someone to your will without ending their life."
Renee: "Sure, but they aren't nearly as entertaining."
Cecil: "Murder for murder's sake is a fool's errand."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Renee: "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Murder for murdering sake is a pointless endavor. When death strikes it should have meaning, otherwise is loses its effectiveness. If we are taken by random chance, what is the fear in it? There is no way to prevent it. As such...
.....
Great Grandfather Augustus, is it normal for persons in the Underworld to turn that color?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "Renee, perhaps you should take a breather. I'll talk to the boy."
Renee: "Must resist urge to have Grim lock him away in the firey pits for a millenia..."
Augustus: "Easy Renee... just breathe. Breathe."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "Now then, Cecil, that is a dangerous game you played. Renee does not take kindly to insulting murder."
Cecil: "I understand, but it was important she understood..."
Augustus: "No, it's not important. Renee can thinks as she pleases so long as it does not affect me in any other way. I realized that when I married her."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "Which brings us back to you. You are here because you need help with your marriage right? You have come to the right person finally, as I can point you in the right direction. I certainly have experience with liberated women."
Cecil: "There is no problem with my marriage sir. And I would like it if we broached another subject."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "That is not what I heard. Rumor has it that you will not engage in any sexual relations with her. I am a bit mystified as to why. When you kiss her do you not get the urge?"
Cecil: "Arg! Kiss her? Simply revolting. Public displays of affection are completely inappropriate!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "But... you can kiss her in private, right? You do own a home... with locks?"
Cecil: "I do... but that does not change the fact it is very inappropriate."
Augustus: "Oh boy."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "Cecil, affection and sex are a part of life. Heck, they are essential part of how it begins. It is nothing to be ashamed of. Surely, you feel something when you look at your wife, do you not?"
Cecil: "I do not feel as though this should be..."
Augustus: "We learn anyway. There is no use in hiding it."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Fine. When I look at my wife, yes, I do feel something. I remember the first time we woo-hoo-ed... even though she drugged me it was still an... enjoyable... experience."
Augustus: "Then why the refusal?"
Cecil: "I believe in purity. Sexual relations and thoughts are impure. They lead to a loss of control of the body and soul. It puts you in a position of weakness... therefore must be avoided."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "Cecil, no one is going to arrest you if you have sex with your wife. Furthermore, most times people are not going to hold it against you. I'm guessing your wife just wants to be close to you. And whether or not you care to admit it, you do like the comfort she gives you. You may want it entirely on your own terms, which is what everyone wants, but like everyone else, that is a pipe dream. Concessions and sacrifices must be made if you are to be happy."
Cecil: "I do not desire happiness."
Augustus: "Of course you do. Your value system gives you some measure of it. And your children must as well; you certainly care about their well being. Caring about something's outcome means one possibility is not desirable."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Augustus: "You have a lot of qualities like my daughter Julia. I pray for your sake, you do not let those qualities overcome your sense of judgement. You saw her, did you not?"
Cecil: "I did. She is... a shameful individual for the way she treats her daughter."
Augustus: "And she is alone because of it. No one can ever comfort her, not anymore. Not because she is a murderer, but because she has willfully destroyed her ability to feel and care for others. She will not allow herself to and thus she is an island. Do not let that happen to you my boy. The only one who will suffer then, is you."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "So... did you have a productive chat with the old man?"
Cecil: "Yes... I admit, he did, make a bit of sense, which is something that I had come not to expect from anyone down here. But where are we going next?"
Pina: "Hell if I know."
Cecil: "Don't you think you should find out?"
Pina: "In a minute. I'm busy writing another Death's Secret. Rhys Fitzhugh is such an "Entitled Fairy". Can you believe Julia wrote something about him too?"
Cecil: "You are such a child, it is depressing to know you actually procrated."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "That's it!!! I've just about enough of your snide remarks about this! You preach to me like you are somehow BETTER than me. Like you are different, like you would try to achieve my goals, or be equally bitter had you failed! You hypocrite! Well no more. I don't care what my agreement was with Death, no chance at being remembered is worth THIS LEVEL OF AGGRAVATION!!!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Sister, you did this to be remembered? How quaint. It is sad you are still chasing after a dream that should have ended after you left the mortal coil. Is that why you throw a tantrum whenever Julia does not hail you as the world's greatest... well what should I call you? You aren't really a murderer and your scheming is rather shortsighted."
Pina: "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up Goodytwoshoes boy. Keep pretending that when you look at me, you dont' see yourself."
Cecil: "Laughable. I am the epitome of class and culture with a stoic exterior. You embody childhood tendencies of jealousy, greed, impatience and emotional immaturity."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "Jealousy? Greed? Emotional Immaturity?! You're right brother. I'm all of those things. But so are YOU!"
I know all about your pathetic past in Pleasantview. About how you cloned yourself in a desperate attempt to claim the Squeaky Clean legacy. How it failed miserably when your emotionally stunted daughter developed independent of your guidance. How you betrayed her love just because she had the audacity to devote herself to someone else! And how you stood by and watched as her life was destroyed along with your grandson's slow descent into madness.
So come on Cecil. I dare you. Call me a child once more. Just be prepared to look in the mirror when you say it!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "I have engaged in this fruitless discussion long enough."
Pina: "Yeah, run away brother. Run away to the comfort of your 'values and ideals'. On your way, make sure to look for my neice's soul. I hear it's gone missing these days. Maybe it's out by your grandson's. Surely they're soon to be joined by those of your wife and current children! I certainly hope they enjoy the dirty being kicked on their emotional graves by their father."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "You... you would dare insult my Cecila like that? Maximilian? Elissandra? Wesley and Horatio?"
Pina: "Stings doesn't it?! Go on you emotionless shell of a man, keep preaching about the weakness of emotion. It's real easy when it's someone else, but when it's you, suddenly, things change."
Cecil: "Nothing... changes. I will not play your deranged game sister."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "That's because you keep trying to convince yourself that you're different. That you're somehow above it all. But here's the deep dark secret Cecil, you are crazy if you actually think you are. You and I, we're the same. Both the cast off children of Gaius Caesar. Our purpose was to be behind a glass pane; broken only in case of emergency. But we both know that was a fallicy. Our fates were never meant to include success."
Cecil: "Speak for yourself. I have accomplished a great deal."
Pina: "Yeah you sure have. Manipulating your daughter. Failing to properly train your grandson. Now here managing to alienate your wife and get poisoned by your nutty sister. Hey, we even got here the same way."
Cecil: "Sister, you and I are nothing alike."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "That' a lie and you know it! My life, like yours was always meant to be periphery. We were there to exist briefly then disappear. Know your role Agrippina! You are the third. You won't be Empress. Boys don't inherit in the Squeaky Clean Cecil. Matralineal legacy. You couldn't sit by and neither could I. We spend our lives trying to show them... trying to prove them wrong, trying to be remembered! I fought, I clawed, I tortured... I was even willing to kill! And in truth you are no different. You manipulated, you undermined, 'sacrificed' all to become the one. Our methods differ slightly, but the madness is the same! And I will not stand by anymore and let you talk down to me as if you are better!!!"
Cecil: "So what is your point sister? What has all of this accomplished you?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "I... I....."
Cecil: "You what?"
Pina: "I......"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "Nothing. All of the scheming, all of the plotting... all of the suffering. Yet... nothing. I am not even hated like father was. Not feared like Julia. Not pitied like Tiberius, nor laughed at like Heather. I will have no lasting legacy like Renee.... nor the satisfaction of knowing I helped create something greater like Augustus. Even Brystin has her own niche. In the end, I was just the failed little sister of a more popular Roman and her Imperial brother. A footnote; to be forgotten about....
I never feared death Cecil. I just never wanted to be an afterthought. After all that effort, all these years, I failed. My life was a failure. When Death offered me the chance to be remembered if I helped you, I took it. But now I see.. now I see it's too late. Nothing I do here will change what they think.
I failed..."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Sister... I am s--... It is unfortunate your life turned out the way it did. While I do not approve of the choices you made, there is some validity in what you speak. No one deserves to live a life without true purpose. It is unfortunate you were unable to find yours in time."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "Listen Cecil, I might think you are a smug, self satisified, egotistical blow hard... but I always respected what you accomplished. You could have just another spare. In a different world, you could have been me. Instead... you managed to turn yourself into something greater... something more. And I respect that. I respect you. I just... wanted you to know that before you go and the world forgets me completely."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Forget you? Go? I do not understand."
Pina: "Oh, and Drusila is never to know we had this conversation. I do not want her getting the satisfaction of knowing I admitted defeat. I'd rather her forget me entirely than have her derive such pleasure in victory."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: *sigh* "Goodbye brother. I sincerely hope we do not meet again anytime soon."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Pina? What was that about--- wait... where am I? The floor tiles..."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Could it be? Have I finally returned to life?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "Cecil?!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "Cecil!!! You're alright! Oh my, I was soo worried about you. I thought you might be gone for good. I didn't know what to do! I can't believe Drusila..."
Cecil: "It is alright, my dear. It is good to see you again."
Elissa: "How do you feel? Dru said you'd wake up but she didn't say what state you'd be in when you did!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "A little weak, but I believe I shall be fine. Though really, I do not understand why you need to be so emotional. If my sister said I would arise, then surely I would."
Elissa: "Says the man who claimed nothing Drusila said could be taken seriously."
Cecil: "I suppose I have learned that my sister is a bit craftier than I had previously believed."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Regardless, you need not show such emotion. It is unlady like. What if the children were here, they would be panicked for little reason."
Elissa: "Are you out of your mind? You nearly died?! I was saying I was happy to have you back and you lecture me about emotions?!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "It is important to maintain yourself under all circumstances my dear. Weakness when crisis strikes is something easily exploited. I know had the situation been reversed I would have kept my cool."
Elissa: "If I had nearly died you would... have not shown an ounce of worry?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Consider the matter closed."
Elissa: "Oh it's closed alright. I am sick and tired of this. If I wanted to marry a statue, I could have easily bought myself a bust of Typhodia. If you aren't going to act like a semi normal husband, then I'm not going to be your wife. Consider this marriage over!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Oh dear... that's not good."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "My dear, perhaps you could reconsider. Think of our children."
Elissa:"I'm not worried. When they are old enough, I'll let our sons know how their father didn't have the stomach to actually fulfill his obligations to his wife. And I'll make sure they don't treat their wives that way one day."
Cecil: "I do not believe that would be appropriate."
Elissa: "And watch me not care. Why should I Cecil? You don't care about my needs? Should I pay attention to yours?"
Cecil: "I do Elissandra."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "Then prove it. Kiss me."
Cecil: "What?"
Elissa: "What I said. It's simple; kiss me."
Cecil: "But..."
Elissa: "Look, I'm not going to beg. If you can't show simple affection, then there's no point."
Cecil: *sigh*
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "See? Was that so bad? Have the evil goblins of pleasure risen up to take you away?"
Cecil: "You would be wise not to be so glib on the matter."
Elissa: "And you would be wise not to treat this like the end of the world. Cecil, it's not a bad thing to explore the physical pleasures in life. We only get one life... we might as well enjoy it. I mean suppose you had died today? Would you want to be remembered as the freak who was so adverse to sex he'd have a baby with himself just to have a family?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "You make it seem like an odd thing."
Elissa: "Yeah, I'm sure people would think it's extremely normal if I announced I wanted to have a baby with myself."
Cecil: "That's why one does not announce such things."
Elissa: "Oh my... What will I ever do with you?"
Cecil: "As much as I may regret saying this... I am sure you can think of... a... few... ways..." *shudder*
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "That's what he said? I have the lamest brothers around. Seriously, even Claudius would be ashamed by that."
Elissa: "Well, I wasn't going to criticize him too much. I was amazed I got that far."
Dru: "So... did he actually do the deed?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "He did, even if he had to keep telling mumbling it was simply for procreation and that he wasn't enjoying it..."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "But for all his complaining, he is efficient. I'm pregnant again. And I'm guessing my parents will be a little more pleased that this baby was conceived without the use of drugging or tombstones."
Dru: "The way it should be. So... I believe a *thank you* is in order."
Elissa: "For?"
Dru: "My plan of making him see the light by sending him to Hades."
Elissa: "Pfft. That didn't do it. I threatened to divorce him."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "You did what?!"
Elissa: "My husband likes to think he doesn't show any vunerabilities, but he does. I'm just smart enough to keep them a secret. Cecil abhors divorce about as much as the woo and he absolutely fears his good name being tarnished. Well, I can do just about anything I want in this city and my reputation for vindictiveness has, shall we say, preceeded me?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "So you never intended to divorce him?"
Elissa: "Of course not. He might be a self serving, egotisitcal jerk, but he's MY self serving egotistical jerk and I know he loves me, even if he's hesitant to show it."
Dru: "And what if he called your bluff? Were you prepared to live with those consequences?"
Elissa: "Says the woman who poisoned her brother to prove a point."
Dru: "Touche."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
And so... that night
Cecil: "Wesley it is late. Did your mother not tell you it is time for bed?"
Wesley: "I am going father. I was just wondering who that is you are painting? She is very beautiful."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "This woman is your aunt Agrippina."
Wesley: "Aunt Agrippina? I didn't know I had an Aunt Agrippina."
Cecil: "You never met her. And she is no longer with us."
Wesley: "Was she nice?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Heavans no. She was a bitter, angry woman who hated almost everyone she ever met and died trying to kill your Aunt Drusila, her sister."
Welsey: "Wait... father, if she is that horrible, why would you ever paint a portrait of her?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Because she is family son. And no matter how horrible your family members are, they are still your family. They deserve some respect and in the event of their passing, some rememberence. Remember that, it will serve you well as you grow older."
Wesley: "It is a beautiful picture father."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Yes, I would say as much."
......
"Rest now sister. Your memory will be a part of my family so long as I live. Such is my gift to you."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Consider my debt repaid."
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cree: 14.02.2009 - mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Author's Note: I hope you did enjoy this little diversion. As you might have guessed this was part of my way of sending off a character I actually liked a great deal. While sudden death can make for good drama, Pina's existence ended so abruptly, I wanted to nice exit, giving the character some closure.
And of course a special thanks and a happy birthday go out to Orikes, who gave me info on how to actually shoot in two different hoods and Professor Butters who created Cecil Goodytwoshoes and provided some tips on writing him, which I no doubt have messed up by stubbornly sticking to my plot ideas.
Until next chapter, Happy Simming.
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Welcome back to the Ten Caesars Valentine's Day special! When we last left our heroes and heroines, Cecil and Pina had just visited Heather Huffington in the Underworld. Meanwhile in the land of the living, Elissandra was about to discover something shocking.
Elissa: "Cecil? I thought I heard something down here... like you are talking to someone, then a loud thud. Is everything alright?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "AH!!!! Cecil!!!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "Oh hi Elissa. Didn't hear you come in."
Elissa: "Drusila Caesar, what have you done?!"
Dru: "Just the result of a little concoction I threw together quickly. Did you know that what chemicals my body produces when I'm pregnant differ from when I'm not? I know I was surprised when I found out."
Elissa: "YOU KILLED MY HUSBAND???!!!!!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "Don't be so melodramatic 'Lis. I didn't kill my brother. I just put him under. Or more specifically, to the underworld."
Elissa: "Wait... you sent him to the underworld... but didn't kill him?"
Dru: "Sure. I arranged with Grimmy to have him speak to his dead ancestors. I figured that would set the guy straight."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "I swear, of all the dumb, crazy things you have ever done Dru, this might be the worst. Poisoning your brother so he can talk to your loony dead ancestors. Lovely."
Dru: "Hey 'Lis, I did it for you. No woman deserves to go without some good lovin from her husband. Besides, you've gone what... almost a year without having a baby? I know how that affects us family oriented folk."
Elissa: "I won't get anymore babies if he's DEAD!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "I told you, he's NOT dead. Just in the underworld until he learns a valuable lesson."
Elissa: "Which is?"
Dru: "Got me. I just figured it would get him to start woo-hoo-ing you more when he does get back to ourside."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Dru: "Speaking of which, I think I could use some woo-hoo myself. I'm headed home."
Elissa: "What?! What now?"
Dru: "Well I'm going to order Sextus into the bedroom and then---"
Elissa: "Not you! Me! Cecil!"
Dru: "Oh. Well when he's learned his lesson, he'll wake up. Oh yeah, give my regards to my nephews."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Elissa: "When he learns his 'lesson' he'll wake up? But... Cecil is so darn stubborn... what if he refuses to learn anything? Does that means he might never wake up?"
That is a question that would only be answered in time. Meanwhile, back in the Underworld...
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Hmph. What stop is this on the Latin tour? I certainly hope no delusional cheese heads live here."
Pina: "Well no cheese heads."
Cecil: "That does not fill me with much confidence."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Pina: "Don't worry. This one apparently wants to see you. She specially requested it. Of course we were coming here anyway, so make sure to tell her that. I hate when she knows she got what she wants."
Cecil: "She? And why do I sense an unmistakable evil eminating from this lot?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Well, well, well. Look at what Death has dragged in."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Cecil Goodytwoshoes. The long lost son of Rome returns. A man who upholds our ideals despite being born in a far off land, filled with horrible corrupting influences like pink, kittens and worst of all, syrupy love."
Cecil: "Surely you do not insult our feline friends."
Julia: "And here it was, I thought you just liked fishes. Well it is good to finally meet you."
Pina: *Ahem* "And let me say, it is an honor to be in your presence Julia."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "You can consider those feelings less than mutual."
Pina: "What?"
Julia: "You are a disgrace and a disappointment. I have little need for whiners who complain about not getting loved enough. I have even less need for those who decide to post their tantrums on Death's Secret, crying like a 12 year old about how we big bad girls are ignoring her. For the life of me, I cannot imagine why we would Cecil, can you?"
Pina: "If you think you can get away with this insult..."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "I can, have and will. Now leave us. I have matters to attend to with a true Roman. Perhaps you can keep the servant some company. I'm sure she'll love to have a fellow child to cry with."
Pina: "Racken freakin *#&$@!! Darn schutta..."
Julia: "Now then Cecil, you probably would like to sit. Allow me to remedy that. SERVANT GIRL! HERE, NOW!"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribonia: "Yes mother?"
Julia: "Mother? You lost the right to use that term years ago. You shall address me by my proper term, as I do you, slave."
Scribonia: *sigh* "Yes, master."
Julia: "Fetch Master Goodytwoshoes a seat at once."
Cecil: "This is strange. I have never seen anyone address their child as slave Mistress Julia."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Let your child betray you and then have a chance at revenge Cecil. You'll find it much harder to pass up than you expect. And Cecila did not actively take part in a scheme against you."
Cecil: "Why would she submit now then?"
Julia: "Because thanks to the power I weild down here, I managed to lock her love Shawn Severus away. She will not see him again until I allow it."
Cecil: "You do not intend her to ever see him again, do you?"
Julia: "Now, now, eternity *is* a long time. So perhaps one day, when I am feeling a touch more generous."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribs: "Here is the chair master."
Julia: "Good. Now keep an eye on that pathetic wench Agrippina. I would not be surprised if she attempts to vandalize mine furniture. If I see one thing out of place, consider it another two weeks before you see your beloved traitor again."
Scribs: "Yes... master..."
Cecil: "............."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Now, let's get down to business. Cecil, I am a large fan of your work. Despire coming from a world with excessive amounts of pink and cuteness, you managed to create an aura of uncertainty and tension the likes of which they had never seen. You did not settle for being told you would be second in line; oh no, you moved forward to seize the day and your enemies, by the throat. And much like myself, you achieved great success."
Cecil: "I am humbled by your praise. However, all I did was maintain a course that was the natural conclusion of Squeaky Clean values."
Julia: "Like I just followed Roman politics to their natural end. Products of our world my boy. I am also very impressed by your ability to keep trivial items like family seperate from the larger goal. The way you manipulated Cecila and did not beg to save Maximilian's life... it nearly brought a tear to my eye."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "I assure you it was only my intent to create and uphold a value system that would serve as the betterment of the world as a whole."
Julia: "That is fine. I don't mind the reasons you give, just that you stick to your principles in face of temptations."
Cecil: "Shall we stop beating around the bush Mistress? What is it you wish to discuss with me?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "Cecil, Roman politics under the Julio-Claudian had an interest twist; heredity never seemed to pass down from father to son. Rather it was always through the grandnephew. Octavian was the grandnephew of Julius Caesar. Caligula was the grandnephew of Tiberius. Claudius was the grandnephew of Octavian. Nero was the grandnephew of Claudius."
Cecil: "I don't follow."
Julia: "Tiberius is my brother. His son was Gaius, my nephew. Since Gaius is your father, that makes you my grandnephew. And considering my original choice for heir is currently disappointing me, I would like to offer you that position when you return to the living."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Why would I choose to do such a thing? I am beholdent to no one."
Julia: "And you should not be. But the rewards for aiding me are immense. Few hold as much sway in the afterlife. When your time comes, I will make sure you spend eternity living like a king."
Cecil: "An intriguing offer. I could go about spreading my values across a city that is in desperate need of moral reform. The depravity of it all. For example, can you believe that my wife is insisting I woo-hoo her on a routine basis? Such a thought is horrifying! Woo-hoo is a dirty thing and should be banned except in cases where science cannot aid in procreation."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "What?! Are you out of your mind?! That's the best part of living! What are you gay or something?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Cecil: "Gay? No, I am merely Asexual. The only times I have engaged in the act is when my wife drugged me with a love potion. Thankfully, I believe I am developing a resistance to it now."
Julia: "This... this is absolutely crazy!"
Cecil: "I beg your pardon?"
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Julia: "What kind of freak wants to outlaw sex? It's pleasurable, occasionally neccessary for procreation and an extremely useful tool to manipulate others with."
Cecil: "It is also extremely dirty."
Julia: "....... Just get out."
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cree: 14.02.2009 mis a jour: 14.02.2009
Scribs: "Agrippina, I have not been allowed to keep up with the events of the living these days. The *explative deleted* will not allow me to learn anything that might be happening as punishment."
Pina: "Oh really? Well then I guess I should tell you the world almost ended a few weeks back."
Scribs: "What happened?! Did barbarian hordes nearly sack Roma?"
Pina: "No, the Arizona Cardinals came within a minute of winning the Super Bowl. When Larry Fitzgerald broke into the open field, I thought for sure we were all about to get a whole lot of company down here."
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